I just pynch a tree in the face
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Randomize
