do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Randomize
