it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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