so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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