There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
