I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Randomize
