That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
