break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
