he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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