this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
