oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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