shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
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