I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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