you would pick up someone in the library
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
My life is pants optional.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize
