$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Randomize
