chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
Randomize
