I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Dude, this old lady messaged me on Facebook talking about her grandson and wanted to know shit about me. I'd almost call her a cougar except she looks like mashed potatoes that have come alive.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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