I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
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