party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
