what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
