I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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