I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
I left the brick of cheese in your car! Keep it at Moderate Temp! It's my precious!
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
soo... how was my night?
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