You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Randomize
