That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
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