but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
