yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
