Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
