Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize