he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
No subtext here. People are naked.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Randomize
