we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
