I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
You were my sober police. You had one job and you failed miserably.
I'm a corrupt cop.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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