The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
