dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Randomize
