I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Randomize
