i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Randomize
