Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Randomize
