I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
