He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
