Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Randomize
