My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
