idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
