i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
Randomize