I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
