They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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