"it" just moved
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
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