I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
