You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize