Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
