She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
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