Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Two words: blizzard sex
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Randomize
