Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
